vanillajello | Room 324, Sunday Evening

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Room 324, Sunday Evening

Kate felt weird. As if she... was supposed to feel kind of dizzy, but everything was completely clear instead. With a vague buzzing, somewhere in the background. It was probably shock.

She was just going to run with it, for as long as it lasted. Then collapse. Maybe cry. She wasn't thinking about any of that right now. Someone else was her priority.

And that someone was Bod, who'd been using her as a walking aid on their way up from the lobby.

"So, what do you need?" she asked when they'd made it to her room.

[ooc: For the poor, poor boyfriend.]

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"I missed you. I missed you," he said and that just brought on a fresh batch of tears. He was going to soak her shirt and or her neck or whatever and he didn't care. He couldn't care.

"It hurt badly," he admitted through his tears, "and I didn't want that to happen to you. I - I - I- "

Bod couldn't quite get the rest out but he figured he'd be forgiven. He was having a little breakdown, after all, and was just surprised he was talking at all.

Okay, so now the tears were coming, and Kate was stupidly glad he couldn't see them. Nevermind that he could probably feel them through his shirt and against his skin, and hear their effects in her voice.

"I know, I know," she replied, trying not to sob too much. "I missed you too. I missed you so much."

Bod breathed roughly against her neck, trying to get his breath back. He ended up just crying again, wondering if he'd ever stop or where all this was even coming from. A dam had burst though and he couldn't barricade things back up.

"I don't want to die," he said again, shaking with the force of the words. "No one deserves what I saw and I don't want to end up like that. It was so bad. It was so bad. I don't want to die."

"We're not there," she replied, trying to soothe even if she was shaken and shaking too. Trying so hard to hold on to being the one who could fix things. "We're not. You're not. You're safe."

That felt like a lie, but a necessary one.

Somewhere in his mind, Bod knew it was a lie but he way too out of it to argue with her. All he could do was cry against her neck and shake in her embrace. He hadn't expected his breakdown to be like this, in front of her but he was almost glad for it. At least he wasn't alone.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry," he mumbled, repeating the mantra several times. "I missed you."

He wasn't alone, and she wasn't letting go of him. By now she had a tight hold on a handful of his shirt, clutching it like her life depended on it.

"I'm here, Bod," she whispered, a little hoarsely. "You don't have to miss me anymore. I'm right here, it's over."

Nodding, Bod pressed his face tighter against her neck, blocking out the light and anything else that might intrude on his breakdown. He was still crying but it'd slowed somewhat and he wasn't shaking quite so much.

"Thank you for being here," he mumbled roughly, meaning it more than she probably knew. He didn't want to think about how he'd been if he'd been alone.

"No problem," Kate mumbled in return. It was a ridiculous reply, but she wasn't exactly thinking straight, what with all the clinging and trembling and the tears on her cheeks and the heavy feeling of exhaustion.

He was lucky he got a reply at all.

"I'm sorry," he said again, finally getting an arm around her to return her embrace. "Thank you for being here. I mean it. I really do. I soaked your shirt."

If he'd been thinking, he would have smiled at the sense of deja vu there. He wasn't thinking. He was clinging and breathin roughly and letting some of the last few tears fall against her skin.

Somehow, even through her muddled thoughts, kate did recognize that, and it made one of the corners of her mouth quirk upwards, even if it was just a fraction. Not that he could see it.

But she didn't say anything about it. "Where else would I be?" she wondered quietly instead, shifting a little for most comforting contact possible.

"As long as you're not where I just was," he said and gave a full body shudder just thinking about it. He clung to her tighter. "I don't know where else you'd be but I know I'm lucky that you're here and you're helping me."

She closed her eyes, though insistent tears made their way out anyway, streaming to her already wet cheeks. Her breakdown wasn't quite as violent as his, but it was still happening.

She'd had so much more to lose, this time around. So much more. And she'd barely even realized it yet.

"Of course I'm here, I... care about you. A lot."

"I know," he breathed, finally really settling down even if he had the problem of some errant, idle tears staining his cheeks and her neck. "I know you do. Even when I didn't think I'd get back, I still knew that."

He'd been pretty low at certain points, ready to just sit down and give up but he still knew that. "I care about you too. Very much. Very, very much."

Some other words tried to come out, something he didn't know. But they stayed inside her mind for the time being, bouncing around there with all her other random thoughts.

"Very much," she echoed, and sighed.

"I know," he said, closing his eyes and taking several long, deliberate breaths. The shuddering finally stopped but he didn't move away from her. The desperate and tight clinging was still there. Bod wasn't sure when he'd stop that.

"I feel the same way about you," he reiterated, nodding slightly. "Thank you for looking after me. Thank you. I don't want to be alone right now."

"I don't want to be alone either," she said. Hence the reciprocated clinging. "Did enough of that already."

She hadn't even really been alone, but she'd felt like it, spending her weekend with people she didn't really know, while almost everyone she cared about had vanished.

"I'm here," he said, making sure his voice wasn't shaky as he said it. "I'll be here. I can't really walk all that fast anyway. I'm sure you'd catch me."

That was a weak attempt at a joke but it was a joke all the same.

"I won't run away," he added in case she wondered. "I won't leave."

Now, in most circumstances, she would've responded to that with a dry well, not unless the island decided to whisk you away, but right now, neither of them needed any reminders when it came to that.

So she simply said, "I know." And clutched his shirt even tighter.

"A-are you all right?" he asked, getting past the initial stammer to get his question out. His tears were drying on his cheeks, drying on her skin and now all he felt was weary and a little embarrassed by the severity of what had just happened.

Her tears were still coming. They liked to do that, the whole thing were they seemed to ignore that she thought she'd stopped crying.

"No," she said, honestly. "But better than I was before."

"I didn't mean to make you cry," he said once he'd pulled back enough to see her face and see those tears. He brushed at them with his fingertips, gentle but a little clumsy. "I'm sorry."

"Not your fault," she said with just the slightest shake of her head. "Don't be sorry."

"You did a good job," he said, glancing down and then back up at her, "on the bandages."

It wasn't a completely on topic statement but it was the truth. It still hurt and he still didn't think walking would be easy but it was better.

"Thank you," she said, a little wryly, letting go of his shirt for a moment to wipe at her eyes with the back of her hand. "I tried."

"You succeeded," he assured her, leaning forward and kissing one of her tears very lightly. "Was it bad? I mean, should I see a doctor?"

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