Room 324, Friday Evening

[vanillajello]

After everything that had happened over the last week, and what little had happened today, Kate was just so very glad to have a completely unrelated thing to focus on.

And right now, that thing was the thought of getting a new fake little sibling tomorrow. So, she'd been putting together a little welcome kit with some useful items. It felt a little dorky, but it was pretty fun, actually, doing that. And distracting, which was the important thing.

She'd even considered baking a batch of cookies, but then decided against it both because there'd be enough food at the welcome picnic, and she wasn't really feeling the idea of standing in the common room baking right now. She'd just offer to bake the kid something at a later date.

So now, Kate was just sprawled on her bed, making a refresher list of all the things a newbie to fair Fandom island should be told on their first day.

And she was eating chocolate. Chocolate was a good thing.

[ooc: Open door, open post!]

Comments

[therewaslife]

"And otherwise?" Bod asked, unable to miss how she'd worded that. "Besides the hangover, you're not all right?"

[vanillajello]

Kate looked down, pursing her lips, and shrugged.

It was a reluctant yes, maybe.

[therewaslife]

Bod frowned and looked down for a minute, not really liking that he'd been right about her not being all right. He much preferred her happy because that didn't eat him up inside.

"Kate, what's the matter?" he asked, lowering his voice now.

[vanillajello]

Kate much preferred herself happy too. It was probably a key thing in her insistence on giving off an impression happiness, most of the time.

"Just... stuff," she said, vaguely, not looking at him. "Hannibal took off."

Though that wasn't nearly all of it. But it was the easiest to pinpoint.

[therewaslife]

"Stuff?" he repeated, reaching out to rest a hand on her back now. "I'm sorry your friend left. Goodbyes are very difficult when you're close to someone. I'm sure you'll see him again."

[vanillajello]

"Yeah, he kinda said that like a bazillion times," she replied, faintly amused. "Still sucks ass. I got used to having him around."

[therewaslife]

"I know it does," he said and nodded briefly. "What else is bothering you?

Bod was almost certain that a friend leaving was not the only thing that was making her not fine.

[vanillajello]

"Just feel a little... off," she replied, shrugging and looking down again. "Too much in too short a time, I guess."

[therewaslife]

"Perhaps," he said and rubbed her back some, keeping his hand light and his movements smooth. "Can I do anything to help?"

[vanillajello]

"I don't know," she sighed. "It'll probably pass on its own."

Or maybe it wouldn't. But she wasn't sure what to do about it.

[therewaslife]

"Mm." In his experience, things never really passed. They were ignored and forgotten until they suddenly reared back up and surprised you. "Are you still upset about what happened between us?"

He couldn't guess about a lot of what was bothering her but he could guess that.

[vanillajello]

Kate was quiet for a long while, just looking down at her newly painted black nails.

A question like that probably deserved an honest answer. But it was pretty quiet.

"Yes."

[therewaslife]

"All right." Expecting that answer still didn't prepare him for the way his stomach dropped just a bit. And he was touching her and he almost felt like he had to move his hand away or do something else after that.

He lightened his touch a little more but didn't completely yank his hand away.

"Can you...tell me why?" he eventually asked. "Or what's still upsetting you?"

[vanillajello]

Kate could feel his touch getting lighter, but hung on to the knowledge that at least he hadn't pulled his hand away entirely.

Oh yeah, this was going to be fun. Only not.

"It was just... It was just really bad," she said, trying to get it out evenly. "And I don't want to be like that."

[therewaslife]

"I know it was," he said, swallowing thickly. "I don't want it to be like that either. Is there more? Tell me?"

He kept his hand where it was, even moving his fingertips back and forth across her shirt now, keeping the contact.

[vanillajello]

"I don't want to be like that," she reiterated, still looking down at her hands. "I don't want to hear you sound like you did or see you look like you did. Not because of me."

[therewaslife]

Bod was looking at her now, even if she wasn't looking at him. He could still see her profile and see that her expression hadn't changed from his vantage point.

"Which...part?" Bod had to ask because, while he had an idea of what she might be talking about, he wanted to make sure. There had been a few heretofore unseen sides of him coming out last week.

[vanillajello]

Good week for variety. Bad for everything else.

Kate's voice got a little quieter still. "The part were you looked and sounded hurt."

[therewaslife]

"I'm sorry," he apologized, nodding. "I was hurt, though, so I don't think I could really help myself. It was an emotional reaction to what was occurring."

If she was going to be honest, he'd be honest as well, even if he knew she wouldn't want to hear it.

[vanillajello]

Kate couldn't help wincing, just a bit.

"I didn't mean you shouldn't have reacted like that." She understood. It had been competely justified. And that had just made it worse for her. "I meant I don't want to be the reason for that reaction."

[therewaslife]

"Kate," he said, sighing and putting a little more pressure on her back now with his hand. "It's all right. I forgave you. We had a bad few days and I don't hold that against you. It could have just as easily been me making you feel like that."

[vanillajello]

"Yeah but..."

She'd said it to Hannibal, but she couldn't quite say it aloud to Bod, now. What her actual problem with all of this was. What she was afraid of.

She sighed. "Nevermind. You forgave me. I know."

[therewaslife]

"Kate, don't do that," he said, shaking his head. "If there's more, tell me, so we can work through this. Please?"

It was going to bother him to know there was more and there was something about this he didn't know and might potentially encounter later.

[vanillajello]

Kate was quiet for a moment, and turned her head away from him some more.

"I'm just worried it's gonna happen again," she said, almost sounding resigned. "I mean, it's kind of what I do, you know? I don't like feeling like shit and I don't like dealing with things, so... I don't."

[therewaslife]

Bod watched her trying to turn away from him and continued to look concerned. His hand stayed where it was, settled heavily on her back.

"If it happens again, we'll work through it again," he decided after a moment. "If this happens again, I'm not going to let it continue like it did. I'll make you stop and I'll make us talk about it."